it’s fine, i’m fine, everything’s fine
Overwhelmed is a feeling I am starting to expect and identify with. I keep having these moments where I’m like, “I think this is just life now!” We have so much going on, and it seems that things just keep getting added to the pile rather than being taken off, and with the beginning of the school year falling in line with all of this, I am feeling like I need to just take a beat and decompress – but there’s no time! DO YOU FEEL ME?! I recently told a friend that I just feel like there is a lot of LIFE hitting me right now. And some of it is in a very good way – but it is just overwhelming.
We will close on our house (!!!) right after my birthday, so soon that will be “over,” but really it has just begun because that just means all the papers will be signed. I am SO excited to be moving into a HOME with my husband and to be starting our life together in the first space that neither of us has lived in before. But with that excitement also comes a lot of work and expenses. We have been looking at living room furniture, trying to decide on decor, I have only packed TWO boxes so far, and we have to figure out and set up building a fence for the doggies. Adulting just seems like a lot of stuff you don’t really know about but you just try your best and then hopefully the next time you can do better.
Along with getting married, moving in together, getting my name legally changed and all of our money stuff joined together, ordering new cards with my new name on them and changing all my account profiles, buying a house, school starting, and Andrew’s busy coaching schedule, we also found out right as school started that Bruno has diabetes. I know to some people it is no big deal, or “he’s just a dog,” but he is my little buddy that I love more than anything in this world. I was really devastated by the news and I’m still trying to navigate the new routine and need for giving him two shots of insulin a day at the same time for the rest of his life. It has been a huge shift for us that we’re still all getting used to, and I know that there will be other complications later from him having diabetes that we will need to prepare for, like cataract surgery or whatever else may come. He’s only 5 so this was a huge shock, but I know we can’t control these things. He seems to be doing better with his insulin shots, and we’ll go back to the vet Monday for some tests to see if his levels are more stable, unless we can’t make it due to the storm.
the sweetest little derpy corgo
So even on top of everything else, hurricane Florence is heading right for us here in Raleigh. We have tried to prepare the best we can, but all of the gas stations are out of gas and all of the grocery stores are out of water. We have food, flashlights, candles, etc. and we will just fill up all of our containers with water before the storm comes, just in case. Mostly I’m worried that if the power goes out, we won’t be able to keep Bruno’s insulin chilled long enough. I am hoping for everyone’s sake that it isn’t as devastating of a hurricane as what everyone is predicting.
I usually do well with a lot of things on my plate at once, but this is big stuff. I’m trying to be positive and focus on the wonderful things, like the new house, being married, having really sweet students this semester, etc. And we are also lucky that we are currently living in a 2nd floor apartment, so if there is flooding, we should be okay. I know that even with terrible circumstances, there’s always a reason and something good that can hopefully come from the struggle. So I will just keep trucking, keep packing up this apartment box by box, keep focused on the good things that are to come as soon as life settles a bit and we get used to this new normal.
Life doesn’t wait for you to be ready for it, so I’m working on letting go of the things I can’t control and just figuring them out as they come at us. We will get through this stressful season and hopefully settle into a new one that allows for a little more down time. There will always be a next thing, so I need to get ready for all the LIFE that will be coming our way in the future. The best part and the biggest comfort is that we get to do it together!
sending lots of safe wishes and thoughts to those who may be affected by hurricane florence this weekend.